(Credit: Robert Jacobs)
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Tark's is a perfectly nice restaurant. But it's for people who value comfort and stability over diversity and vitality. Think boat shoes, G and Ts, ruddy cheeks and a healthy paunch.
Food: We had a hamburger ($9.50) which, like the restaurant's clientele, was perfectly respectable but somewhat self-satisfied. It wasn't going out of its way to impress us but, being well-bred, it kept up appearances. At $9.50 a pop, we want a little more than good manners in a hamburger—we want to be entertained...you know, do a little soft-shoe or something. Fortunately it came with sweet potato fries, which were tasty and surprisingly frisky.
If you can afford to move beyond light fare, you might consider the filet mignon ($28.95), Chilean sea bass ($28.95) or the Maryland seafood Cobb salad ($24.95), which includes shrimp, crab and scallops. These items were highly recommended by our server Stephanie. The service, by the way, was excellent.
Booze: Well there's good news and bad news. The good news is there's absolutely no shortage of booze here. We stopped counting at 20 brands of bottled beer. For draft beer, there's Bass, Hoegaarden, Budweiser, Bud Lite and Stella Artois. The wine list is truly extensive. We counted approximately 100 different types of wine. The bad news is there's no happy hour (a positively un-American practice by our calculations). So, if you want to get plastered, you'll need a credit card or a fat wallet.
Digs: Tark's is all golden low-key lighting and rich, burgundy-red walls with black wood trim. The restaurant is basically split into two areas: the main dining room on one side and the bar on the other. The bar area also has tables for dining in case you want something a little less formal.
Vibe: This is a good place to discuss your stock portfolio in an intimate, warm and sophisticated setting. It isn't stuffy, but it is somewhat formal. It's mature and traditional...which is great...for mature, traditional types, which we're not.
