The Chocolate Affair is in its 17th year, and it's obvious why. With 58 vendors serving everything from shrimp to samosas, it's not all about chocolate. The event is also about Health Care for the Homeless, which benefits from the Affair. Do-gooding and tasty Indian appetizers aside, it really is (let's face it) mostly about chocolate.

My friend (and Metromix.com producer) Amanda and I ate what felt like a small village. (Great, now I need new pants.) We started off on a bad foot, though. Jonathan at the Chocolatea booth handed us each a cup of green tea hot cocoa that tasted like creamy, unsweetened butt. That brought me back to my original presumption that drinking green things is generally a bad idea. Gertrude's was there with some serious crap, too—tiny chili bombs that blow your face off with disgusting flavors cleverly disguised as tasty chocolate desserts. After we tossed those and the cocoa, we moved on to some absinthe-infused gelatinous chocolates. Absinthe, in case you didn't realize, is green. 'Nuff said.

Things were looking up after we left that part of the hall, though. That's when we discovered a delicious shrimp medley from Bonefish Grill, Brie and cranberries on chocolate bread and designer martinis filled with Chambord and Patron. Every time we queued up in a new line, I thought, "well, that's it, I can't eat another bite." Then I'd see what treats would reward our patience, and managed to find room. Amanda's favorite was obviously the tuna sashimi on cucumbers with a dollop of wasabi. I say "obviously," because we somehow managed to find ourselves in that line several times.

For us non-pescetarians (or whatever they call themselves), The Capital Grille's steak and potatoes was the best bet. If the idea of savory food doesn't jive with your idea of a chocolate event around Valentine's Day, rest assured. The place was full of sweets. There was enough booze and dessert there to tempt even a fasting Gandhi.

You know those times you want to taste a little of everything, but can't? The Chocolate Affair is a place to live that dream. It only happens once a year, though, and you have to fight hordes of similarly-minded people with equally voracious appetites. Apparently, you also have to fight the mayor and people who care enough about her to clamor for photo opps, as if that skinny politician has any place blocking the samosa table. For the record, Mayor Dixon, we were staring because you were choc-blocking us.

Besides the mayor and the first weird treats we sampled, the only other possible criticism that can be raised of this otherwise amazing event is the foot-rubbing. Seriously. People were getting foot massages on site. How are we supposed to digest while strangers have their bunions stroked?

If you're thinking of going next year, make sure you get to M&T Bank Stadium early. Attendance increases every year, and you don't want to have to wait to nibble all these tasty delectables. (Or miss a free foot rub—blech.)