(Credit: Mark Gross)
Pick your poisons
So many drinks, so little time
Metromix Staff
August 17, 2007Box of chocolate poisons
Is it entirely too decadent to want dessert and drunkenness all at once? Well, yes, it probably is. When your extravagant side screams for attention, shut it up with one of these chocolate concoctions. Just don't have too many.
Poisons in bad taste
You drink liquor with that mouth?
Poisons: Cool cocktails
Rock out with your cuke out!
Dive Bar Poisons
In this pristine age, when a lock of hair in a salad is a surefire lawsuit, it's sometimes good to take chances. That's what these dive bar drinks are for. They're unique, they're dodgy: they might truly be considered poisons.
Poisons: Frozen Drinks
Daiquiris, coladas and margaritas are just the tip of the iceberg. Baltimore's bartenders have created these innovative frozen drinks, and though they'd probably be just as refreshing without the booze, what's the point? Stay cool. Stay buzzed.
Hair of the Dog
After a long night of drinking like it's our job (which it is), we head right back to the bar and do it all over again. Whether it's a post-holiday cure-all or just a little something to keep the weekend going, take two of these, and call us when you're ready for happy hour. It's your M.O., and it's ours, too.
Poisons: Hipster bar drinks
Get hip and hammered
Lovely 'Ritas
The Beatles probably didn't have tequila in mind when they penned "Lovely Rita," but we'll take margaritas over meter maids any day. Enjoy Baltimore's spin on the frosty favorite, salted rim and all. Just don't sing the Jimmy Buffett song, please. Please.
Orioles-Inspired Poisons
Whether you're a fan of the baseball team or Maryland's state bird, plenty of bars offer cocktails that let you show your love. For obvious reasons, many of them are orange-flavored. If you hate citrus, you might just wear an O's hat instead.
Poisons: Power ups
Metromix solves your energy crisis
Poisons: Ra
Harbor East hang puts the bar in sushi bar
Ravens-Inspired Poisons
Football and alcohol have always made a great team. They do everything together. Too often, though, beer monopolizes many fans' game-watching celebrations. These purple poisons want your affection--perhaps at the expense of your wallet and your liver.
Red Bull Poisons
Science claims it's a really bad idea to mix stimulants and depressants. Science also tells us that Pluto isn't a planet. Why trust science, then? These cocktails marry booze and Bull, and you, friend, are invited to the wedding.
Poisons: Swanky Lounges
Ordering a bottled beer or a Jack and Coke is perfectly acceptable at your typical neighborhood bar, but if you're out at a lounge, choosing the right drink may make all the difference.
Poisons: Sweet and Sour Sips
Long Island iced tea never tastes like tea, and Lynchburg lemonades aren't exactly what Southern-fried youngsters sip on porch swings. What else are these mixed drinks hiding? Metromix explores the nefarious underbelly of sweet and sour cocktails, where the only thing stronger than the booze is the suspense.
Poisons: Tropical Getaways
Baltimore isn't exactly a hot vacation spot, let alone a tropical getaway. Since not everyone can win a trip to Hawaii on "Wheel of Fortune," area bars are kind enough to offer us these consolation prizes. There's no sunshine, but they're still warming.
Poisons: Wake up and smell the coffee drinks
Need to wake up? Here's a collection of our alternatives to the Red Bull and vodka rage. The Starbucks craze has made it to the bar scene, giving new meaning to the words double espresso. Beware, these coffee-flavored poisons will do more than caffeinate--they'll inebriate.
Poisons
There's lots more. What are you waiting for?
